Wednesday, May 02, 2007

My Biggest Crush

Since the early 90's, I've been obsessed with a little boy from a TV ad. Back then, he was the most perfect-looking boy I ever laid my eyes on, whether that be in real life or TV. His face got imprinted in my memory and my obsession with him slowly got deeper with time. I used to dream about him, daydream about him, fantasize about him. I don't know what it was about his face but it was the only face I could recall every detail about.

The obsession got even bigger when I recorded that TV ad on a betamex tape and would watch his bit over and over and over again. Every single man I came across I would turn into him/his face when he wasn't around.

Never did I stop for 1 second and question my sanity. Never did I doubt my sanity in the first place. Adoring him was the only normal feeling I had. His memory was there with me, during my high school years, with fights, when I left school, when I moved to university, it was always him him him.

It's been 16 years now since that first time I saw him in that TV ad, and I'm a fully grown, balanced woman, but his face is still the most perfect face I have ever known. He still haunts my dreams and fantasies and when I think of him, the face is still the same but the body is that of a late 20's fit man.

Seldom have I considered searching for him but I was always too busy with school/work. It never was a bad obsession to me but a healthy feeling. Besides this obsession, I've had a pretty normal, fun life.

And yesterday I came across that ad and it all came back to me, all those emotions..

He is probably a married middle-aged man now with a few children and perhaps slightly overweight, but I am so tempted to find him, not to love him but simply to see what he's like now and get him out of my system once and for all. I am getting bored of imagining his face on every guy's body.

So should I try? Or should I use the powers of the earth to summon him to me?
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Till we meet again,
Sedeso

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