Last night I spoke to him and was on the verge of tears. I want more devotion and dedication. I am so greedy and have my fair share of jealous fits.
So how do I feel 4 days after coming back from my trip?
Mixed emotions that's what I will call them.
There's sheer bliss, knowing that The One? is mine for now. I own his heart and soul. I am his one and only.
There's a slight worry that this is the best it'll get and there's no what's next.
And there's the insecurity of his past, and my constant worry about what if any were better than me, in looks, in bed, in attitude. Although my therapist and every other sane person keep on reminding me that if his past meant anything then it'd still be here. He got over it, regrets some of it and chose me. So this should be the biggest indicator of his dedication.
I also feel sad because it was a great week that we spend together. It was so relaxed and we thoroughly enjoyed each other's company. I was too relaxed that I had a few vaginal orgasms, so this should tell you something.
Nobody has a clean slate and certainly not a 30-year-old man. Here's the stereotype: Bedouins are known to fall in love deeply and intensely, are possessive of their loves, show their emotions physically whilst they make love, marry for love more than modern Arabs, are great in bed, but they are also known to fall in and out of love easily and sleep with other women they like even more easily.
What I will never understand are one-night stands. How can you touch someone you have no feelings for? How do you feel knowing that you've picked up a girl in front of your friends and you're screwing her in the next room? How much respect will your friends have for you, regardless of whether they are doing the same thing or not?
I cannot believe I am going around in circles when it comes to my insecurities. Let's see when it's going to come to an end. I need to gain more confidence, become self-assured and get over a lot of insecurities.
Annoyed because she has a professional make-up artist and hairstylist to do her up whereas I only have myself to work on my looks.
So how do I feel 4 days after coming back from my trip?
Mixed emotions that's what I will call them.
There's sheer bliss, knowing that The One? is mine for now. I own his heart and soul. I am his one and only.
There's a slight worry that this is the best it'll get and there's no what's next.
And there's the insecurity of his past, and my constant worry about what if any were better than me, in looks, in bed, in attitude. Although my therapist and every other sane person keep on reminding me that if his past meant anything then it'd still be here. He got over it, regrets some of it and chose me. So this should be the biggest indicator of his dedication.
I also feel sad because it was a great week that we spend together. It was so relaxed and we thoroughly enjoyed each other's company. I was too relaxed that I had a few vaginal orgasms, so this should tell you something.
Nobody has a clean slate and certainly not a 30-year-old man. Here's the stereotype: Bedouins are known to fall in love deeply and intensely, are possessive of their loves, show their emotions physically whilst they make love, marry for love more than modern Arabs, are great in bed, but they are also known to fall in and out of love easily and sleep with other women they like even more easily.
What I will never understand are one-night stands. How can you touch someone you have no feelings for? How do you feel knowing that you've picked up a girl in front of your friends and you're screwing her in the next room? How much respect will your friends have for you, regardless of whether they are doing the same thing or not?
I cannot believe I am going around in circles when it comes to my insecurities. Let's see when it's going to come to an end. I need to gain more confidence, become self-assured and get over a lot of insecurities.
Annoyed because she has a professional make-up artist and hairstylist to do her up whereas I only have myself to work on my looks.
Till we meet again,Sedeso
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