"Quote" I can never explain what it's like to lose a mother. when I put those pink flowers on my mom's gravesite today, I was not sad because she was gone. I was sad because I missed her & there's a difference. heaven is said to be a place of unspeakable joy, beyond the extension of our understanding. if my mom can escape all the BS of the world and be with God, then that brings peace to my soul. it's just the missing ... HS graduation, Spelman acceptance, my career, my marriage, Christmas, my bro's prom, my children ... I won't be able to talk to her about it. it's just the missing. still, I am so thankful for a beautiful, bubbly, smart woman who loved me selflessly, relentlessly, and wisely. she is the epitome of who I want to be ... God, I am still thankful :] "Unquote:"
I love my mother so much of course and I am proud to say that I take so many of her wonderful qualities. We both love deeply and selflessly. We both have charisma and are beyond average attractiveness. I won't go on about the positive qualities but some of the ones that bug me.
I thought I was stubborn until I realized it all comes from my mother. Her stubbornness comes before her happiness and tranquil mind.
It is her, partly, who pressures me into the whole marriage thing. I am dying for it myself but with my mother, it's an added burden of pressure and I cannot wait to get married simply to break free from her influence. I won't cut off all ties, but at least I'll do things my way and deal with people differently. I must however acknowledge the fact that she is my absolute rock without whom life would be difficult and bitter. I simply need space and to be allowed to live my life my way. I guess my years traveling all over and current living arrangement are a blessing from God who knows how much we will clash living under one roof, .....
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Stevi
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